Throwing myself a bone

Is it really all about the chase?

Let's compare "it" to the dog park. You've got all types and temperaments of dogs. There are the big dogs, the small dogs, the alpha dogs, the meek dogs, the outgoing playful dogs, the shy and timid dogs; it's a melting pot of canine personalities. And when a new dog crosses the threshold into the pen most of the other dogs come over to greet it--a literal sniff test. Some dogs respond with aggression, some retreat, and some sniff right back.

And then there's the dog that immediately flops his body onto his back, belly exposed, completely submissive. That dog, right there? Yeah, that one? That's me.

Whenever I see that dog I think, "Come on, buddy. Don't give in so easily, you just made an alpha out of a honest-to-goodness zeta." But you know what? That's just how that dog is wired. And try as he might to change that, his nature is to throw himself down, as if to say, "hey, here's everything I got, check it out, no need to hide anything, I think it's all good but you be the judge."

I know that well. I trust almost everyone from the very beginning. But that makes me vulnerable. It leaves me open for attack, and for disappointment, but also for possibility; you just don't know what you're going to get. And when you come across one of those skittish dogs, the one that needs a lot of time to build trust, the one that's leery of your every move because he's experiencing those moves with his own filter building his own story around why you're moving the way you're moving. You really don't know what you're going to get.

But the thing is, you're a dog. And at this point, you're reflexive response is not going to change. So you just have to keep doing your thing and maybe the skittish one will eventually come around. Or maybe one of the other types will come by and will be the one you play fetch with for the remainder of your time in the dog park.

You just don't know. Note to self: the only thing you do know is your nature, and you have to be true to that. No matter how vulnerable it leaves you. And no matter if that takes you out of the chase, new tricks are not really an option here, but knowing your old ones and knowing what that means and what you need is. If every dog was in a chase, how would order ever be served? No, you need all types at the dog park--even if it means you are lying supine, exposing yourself and your heart to the world. Not all dogs will know what to do with that, but some will. And when one of those ones come along, he will make every day in the dog park the greatest day.